The Bitch or the Bullshit

I meet a lot of men who claim that women are crazy and all of his exes were bitches.

But which came first, the Bitch or the Bullshit? Think about it, the common denominator in this man’s past is HIM. So was he a bullshitter and brought the bitch out of his exes or were his exes really bitches to begin with?

My last ex made the same complaints about his exes and I’m sure he’s making the same complaint about me as well to someone new. His major complaint was that the women he dated in the past were just bitchy or needy. After 6 months of dating I knew why. He was distant when something was bothering him, secretive, and overall very emotionally cold 90% of the time. Naturally my response was to be super warm to him and try to pull the love out of him which probably came off as needy. Then it erupted to the point of frustration because I did not understand his behavior. I turned into a bitch to him because he seemed to only respond to my negative behavior. He was one of those “oh you are mad at me so let me be super sweet” type of guys! Here I was a nice woman turned bitch because of his bullshit.

Another major complaint I hear from men is about the “crazy” girl. It’s somewhat of a combination of the type listed above with an extra splash of WTF. No woman is crazy for no reason. For example, I had a guy tell me that all of his exes were super paranoid and always questioning him. Within 30 minutes of talking to him I realized why. He is one of those guys that answers a question with a question. He’s one of those guys that has a CIA level password on his phone and keeps it locked in a safe at night (exaggeration but you get it). He’s also one of those guys who will tell you he went to the store only for you to find out he went to another state. A general all around bullshitter. So although he claimed all of his exes were paranoid, he really fed into the paranoia thus creating a bitch from his bullshit.

Lastly, men tend to complain about the woman that thinks the relationship is more than what it actually is in his eyes. Perhaps he told her he’s not ready for a relationship, or he’s busy seeing multiple women, or he just considers their relationship to be sexual. Either way, this woman starts having boyfriend expectations of this man and he quickly responds that she is tripping, crazy, and delusional The problem is that some men tend to romance a woman he’s NOT that serious about the SAME WAY he would romance a woman that he is serious about for the sake of being “nice” and keeping her around. He’s sweet, remembers important events, calls, and is attentive. He takes the woman on dates and even starts meeting friends. It FEELS like a relationship. Of course that’s until he quickly reminds the woman that she is NOT his girlfriend by making a relationship with someone else, sleeping with someone else, or acting distant. Now the woman is out looking crazy and he’s busy telling all of his friends that she is tripping. Yet he does not recognize that he fed into her fantasy with his bullshit. Now he’s blaming her for taking the bait and calling her a bitch.

Sometimes women really are just bitchy. However, men tend to blame women a lot for their sometimes bitchy behavior but fail to realize that their own bullshit is what brought out that behavior in the first place. While men are busy generalizing all of his exes with the ‘bitch’ title it may just be him that has turned them this way. It takes a level of maturity to recognize that you may be responsible for how poorly situations seem to end and that is a difficult pill for some to swallow.

So next time you hear a man say all of his exes were crazy ask him one simple question – which came first? The bitch OR the bullshit?

Check out more from Dee Rene at Laugh Cry Cuss.com and follow her on twitter @allthingzrandom